1)Face the speaker and maintain eye contact.
2)Be attentive yet relaxed.
3)Keep an open mind.
4)Listen to the words and try to picture what the speaker is saying.
5)Don't interrupt and don't impose your "solutions."
6)Wait for the speaker to pause to ask clarifying questions.
7)Ask questions only to ensure understanding of something that has been said (avoiding questions that disrupt the speaker's train of thought).
8)Try to feel what the speaker is feeling.
9)Give the speaker regular feedback, e.g., summarize, reflect feelings, or simply say "uh huh."
10)Pay attention to what isn't said -- to feelings, facial expressions, gestures, posture, and other nonverbal cues.
Listening is a precious gift -- the gift of time. It helps build relationships, solve problems, ensure understanding, resolve conflicts, and improve accuracy. At work, effective listening means fewer errors and less wasted time. At home, it helps develop resourceful, self-reliant kids who can solve their own problems. Listening builds friendships and careers. It saves money and marriages.