Robin: Fine! let’s just eat here!
Ted: We- can’t eat here it’s an ATM.
Robin: But- food.
Barney: Ow, ow! Hey!? what the-
Lily: This is your fault, you and your stupid bank! You did this!
Barney: It’s not my, sto-! Okay- Oww! Stop it, Lily!
Lily: I will never use a Goliath ATM ever again! Goliath National Bank, sucks! It’s the worst bank on the face of the earth! Attention New Yorkers! This bank suucks! They suuck! They suck, suck, suck!
Barney: Aw jeez, Marshall would you just tell her already!
Lily: Tell me what?
Tell me what?
Marshall: I got a job.
Lily: What? Where?
Marshall: Goliath National Bank. That’s why Barney’s been going on and on about how great Goliath is, he wanted you to be excited for me since we’re gonna be working there together now.
Barney: Well, technically not together. You won’t have access to my floor.
Lily: But you wanna be an environmental lawyer.
Marshall: Yeah. You know, and I also wanna be a Harlem Globetrotter and get paid in candy but in the meantime, I need a job! And this is- this is a really good one! It’s great pay, and there’s good benefits, and to be honest, it gives me a reason to put on pants in the morning. You know I have my whole life to save the planet but, right now I’m kinda really excited to wear pants again.
Lily: You’ve got great pants.
Lily: I love you.
Marshall: I love you.
Ted: Robin no!
Ted: Give it!
Robin: [kinda unintelligible “but they’re unopened!” ** “these are barbecue!”]
Ted: Give it!!
Lily: I’m sorry you didn’t get your burger.
Marshall: Its stupid. I think about that first week in New York, you know. I was twenty-two years old. I have my whole future ahead of me. I guess I just kinda thought that If I could have that burger one more time, and feel that way for one more night. That I might be able to check that off the list and grow up. Go work for this stupid bank and just be happy.
Random dude: You know that burger place isn’t gone. It just moved to a new location. And I can tell you where that is, for a hundred bucks.
Robin: A hundred bucks that’s crazy
Marshall: Let's pay the man.
Lily: I paid for the cab!
Ted: Uh oh. Um, I don’t have any cash!
Marshall: I haven’t worked since march.
Barney: Uh wow, if only there were an easy, convenient way to get some cash right now.
[holy music]
Barney: Member FDIC
Future Ted: So, we paid the guy, and twenty minutes later.
Ted: Alright Marshall, remember, it might not taste as good. This place has changed, you changed, New York has changed. Just, don’t get your hopes up too high, okay?